Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Do you think is good writing?

I think you should change your first sentence. It's unbelievably cluttered and didn't make me want to keep reading. The rest of it is pretty boring to me, but perhaps that's because I'm not one for school settings. You also say freshman way too much in the paragraph. That's bad. Other than that stuff though I didn't find much wrong with it.

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